Do you ever wake up in the morning and just have an uncanny realization that today is a new day? Usually I feel this happen to me a few times a month , but it hadn't in a while until this morning. Megan and I started going to 5:30 prayer again. Actually we told Eddie he could host it at our home so we would have no choice but to wake up really (hey, we have to go to extremes sometimes to be disciplined right?). Having prayer in our house gives me a lot of peace. I remember how much these prayer meetings changed my life a year ago and coming back to them I just feel Him again.
Anyway, so this morning I woke up and we had prayer and then I had coffee with our new brother in the Lord, Vincent. Vincent is in many ways the male version of me three years ago. The similarities in our coming to the Lord are eerie at times. Talking to him this morning though about the struggles Christians face in their walk though was just outstanding. At the same time though, it made me realize a lot of the grey I have allowed to creep into my Christian walk. Grey that should appear much more black and white in a Christian following Christ. So this morning on this brand new glorious morning where the sun was actually shining for the first time in a while, I want to do something about it. Our adult sponsor on our trip to New Orleans asked me while we were down there what things in my Christianity I would take with me to Mission Year as my foundational truths and life commitments. At the time, I gave him a very typical church response, that though true was not very specific. Well it's time to get specific. For the next few months therefore that is my plan and I would love all the help and accountability I can get along the way. I want to look at where I am still falling short of glorifying God in my actions and discipline and quite honestly make a solid, tangible commitment to action to follow Him more diligently and faithfully. I am a person who needs structure and a clear response and without that my responses get all muddled with life and humanity. Why not take this time now while I have it to really look at and seek Godly disciplines in my life? I am tired of pushing life choices aside and saying "one day when I need to I will". That one day is going to come when I am not looking and I am probably going to respond in some pretty ungodly ways without having really given thought to what my life looks like when lived in line with Christ. So here I am diving in head first ready for whatever I may hit as long as it is on the way to Him.
Showing posts with label Christian walk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christian walk. Show all posts
Apr 1, 2008
Feb 13, 2008
six months and a few weeks later.
Its taken me a while to process thru ( which is something we do A LOT down at God's Resort)the changes that i feel i have gone thru since moving to God's Resort. Katie posted a while back, and i do agree with what she said the changes in me have been.
In a way, im not sure "change" is the right word. I would maybe use "grow" or "mature". All i know is that i am happy, im closer to Jesus every day, and i love were i am. Sure there are some "hard" physical situations, with the slow return of the roaches and the constant need for repair in the house. But my walk with Christ is stronger and closer.
My number one big change or realization that i have gone thru is realizing that i dont need to know my future plans. When people realize that im close to getting done with college, they ask me what i plan to do. and every time i kind of give a half hearted responce of "ohh i dont know". but the truth is, I AM DOING what i want to do with my life.
As a culture, we tend to think that when we get done with a certain thing, then we can do what we always wanted, or we can start living for the Lord, or we can have our perfect life. In our minds we say: When i get done with college ill know what i want to do with the rest of my life. or when i get married ill know, or when i have kids, or when i get a house, or when i join a ministry, or when my kids grow up, or when i get a better car, or when, etc. and we never live in the present.
And if we lived in the present we would invest our time and energy into what we are already doing. We could commit ourselfes.
Im living ministry. something that not all people can do or are even called to do. There are a lot of people who "do" ministry, but there are only a few who "live" minsitry. There is a difference between doing ministry and living ministry. The biggest one that comes to mind for me is that when you "do" ministry, it means that at the end of the day you get to go home and continue living completely seperate from your ministry.
Living at God's Resort, i have realized that "living"minsitry is something i want to do. For the rest of my life, i want to LIVE ministry. i dont want to go home at the end of the day and live completely seperate from the hurting world out there. I have realized that my career cant be the most important thing in my life. Living ministry is what i want to do with my life. I have plans for my future career (dont get me wrong, i realize the importance and need for me to be self sustainable in financial matters), but if this was all i focused on, i would probably go crazy.
My sister Erica has helped me realize a lot of this. That when we go to college, college is what our lives become, we focus completely on it. As freshman we live in the dorm, hang out with college age kids, our biggest dilema is what to do for fun. but school shouldnt be that we focus on our life on it should be our ministry, our walk with Christ, and school is something that helps us in these areas. So it is the same with our careers. Our work should be something that enables us to do ministry; and this is different for each person.
So how have i changed in the last six months?. for the most part, i have figured out what i want to do with the rest of my life. i want to live in the NOW. live in the present. (not totally forget about the future) but start living in a way that i do now the most that i can for Christ.
In a way, im not sure "change" is the right word. I would maybe use "grow" or "mature". All i know is that i am happy, im closer to Jesus every day, and i love were i am. Sure there are some "hard" physical situations, with the slow return of the roaches and the constant need for repair in the house. But my walk with Christ is stronger and closer.
My number one big change or realization that i have gone thru is realizing that i dont need to know my future plans. When people realize that im close to getting done with college, they ask me what i plan to do. and every time i kind of give a half hearted responce of "ohh i dont know". but the truth is, I AM DOING what i want to do with my life.
As a culture, we tend to think that when we get done with a certain thing, then we can do what we always wanted, or we can start living for the Lord, or we can have our perfect life. In our minds we say: When i get done with college ill know what i want to do with the rest of my life. or when i get married ill know, or when i have kids, or when i get a house, or when i join a ministry, or when my kids grow up, or when i get a better car, or when, etc. and we never live in the present.
And if we lived in the present we would invest our time and energy into what we are already doing. We could commit ourselfes.
Im living ministry. something that not all people can do or are even called to do. There are a lot of people who "do" ministry, but there are only a few who "live" minsitry. There is a difference between doing ministry and living ministry. The biggest one that comes to mind for me is that when you "do" ministry, it means that at the end of the day you get to go home and continue living completely seperate from your ministry.
Living at God's Resort, i have realized that "living"minsitry is something i want to do. For the rest of my life, i want to LIVE ministry. i dont want to go home at the end of the day and live completely seperate from the hurting world out there. I have realized that my career cant be the most important thing in my life. Living ministry is what i want to do with my life. I have plans for my future career (dont get me wrong, i realize the importance and need for me to be self sustainable in financial matters), but if this was all i focused on, i would probably go crazy.
My sister Erica has helped me realize a lot of this. That when we go to college, college is what our lives become, we focus completely on it. As freshman we live in the dorm, hang out with college age kids, our biggest dilema is what to do for fun. but school shouldnt be that we focus on our life on it should be our ministry, our walk with Christ, and school is something that helps us in these areas. So it is the same with our careers. Our work should be something that enables us to do ministry; and this is different for each person.
So how have i changed in the last six months?. for the most part, i have figured out what i want to do with the rest of my life. i want to live in the NOW. live in the present. (not totally forget about the future) but start living in a way that i do now the most that i can for Christ.
Feb 4, 2008
6 Months Later...
February 1st marked our six month stay at God's Resort. I remember in September there being moments where we definitely didn't think we would make it this far, but we have and quite honestly I think we have been successful in more ways than one. We were hanging out with our mentor last Friday and discussing the ways that we have changed and the things we have learned and I think we surprised ourselves in just how long that list was. I think I can probably speak for both of us on the following things we have learned, but just in case Meg would put it differently here is my list of a few things I have learned:
1. Loving people you don't know can be really hard at first, but the longer you do it and the more unconditional you can make it, the easier it gets.
2. Patience is a virtue for a reason and things all go much more smoothly if you can practice a lot of it.
3. Finding a way to view others as God sees them helps with the above. Once you can see someone for who God has created them to be, without all of the baggage of the flesh and this world, they shine with a holy radiance that cannot help but make you love them.
4. Jesus is real and not only because I see Him alive in the scriptures, but because I see Him alive in our neighborhood. The same stories that we hear of His life on earth are still totally applicable to our world today no matter how different it may look. We just need to be creative enough to see the application for them.
5. Truth may be my foundation to stand upon, but faith and hope are what keep me clinging to it when things get rough.
6. Community is vital to not only a Christian’s growth, but their survival as well. At one point for me that community was a group of peers that challenged me as we grew together, now my community is my neighborhood and even though they may not be well-educated or look like the world wants them to, they have taught me just as much if not more about what it means to be a Christian that is totally reliant on God and completely enthralled with Jesus than the Church or my peers.
How have I changed/what have I learned about myself:
1. I do not need breaks nearly as much as I have been taught I do or taken in the past.
2. I can be a very patient and flexible person with people in my neighborhood, but not so well with those I work alongside.
3. I love living in the middle of such chaotic life, even on the days I seem fed up with it, because no matter how tough it seems, it is more worthwhile and more exciting than any other life I have led.
4. I have finally begun to understand how to marry the Christian walk with what I have pursued in my education.
5. I am more controlled, less sarcastic, and feel in control. I have a newfound confidence in Christ and therefore do not lash out or feel insecure as much in my interactions with others.
6. Everyone needs to be able to process what is going on around them and when they can’t it is usually the start of a lot of life problems. Everyone processes things differently according to their walk and their role in the kingdom and that is okay as long as the outcome mimics Christ. Most of the time when my actions don’t mimic Christ it’s because I never processed them through a Christian frame to begin with.
For fun, how Megan has changed:
1. She has truly excelled at the work at God’s Resort and found her gifting in working with the kids, including crafts, teaching the kids everyday life skills, beautifying things in the neighborhood.
2. She has put herself out there with the families in a far more open way then she used to with our friends, putting herself in their homes and being real with them.
3. She has relaxed a lot about life and become more patient as well.
Well I just thought it would be fun to share some of these things. There are so many just random life lessons that we have learned, but there is not enough time for me to write them down nor do I kid myself in thinking you want to read them all.
1. Loving people you don't know can be really hard at first, but the longer you do it and the more unconditional you can make it, the easier it gets.
2. Patience is a virtue for a reason and things all go much more smoothly if you can practice a lot of it.
3. Finding a way to view others as God sees them helps with the above. Once you can see someone for who God has created them to be, without all of the baggage of the flesh and this world, they shine with a holy radiance that cannot help but make you love them.
4. Jesus is real and not only because I see Him alive in the scriptures, but because I see Him alive in our neighborhood. The same stories that we hear of His life on earth are still totally applicable to our world today no matter how different it may look. We just need to be creative enough to see the application for them.
5. Truth may be my foundation to stand upon, but faith and hope are what keep me clinging to it when things get rough.
6. Community is vital to not only a Christian’s growth, but their survival as well. At one point for me that community was a group of peers that challenged me as we grew together, now my community is my neighborhood and even though they may not be well-educated or look like the world wants them to, they have taught me just as much if not more about what it means to be a Christian that is totally reliant on God and completely enthralled with Jesus than the Church or my peers.
How have I changed/what have I learned about myself:
1. I do not need breaks nearly as much as I have been taught I do or taken in the past.
2. I can be a very patient and flexible person with people in my neighborhood, but not so well with those I work alongside.
3. I love living in the middle of such chaotic life, even on the days I seem fed up with it, because no matter how tough it seems, it is more worthwhile and more exciting than any other life I have led.
4. I have finally begun to understand how to marry the Christian walk with what I have pursued in my education.
5. I am more controlled, less sarcastic, and feel in control. I have a newfound confidence in Christ and therefore do not lash out or feel insecure as much in my interactions with others.
6. Everyone needs to be able to process what is going on around them and when they can’t it is usually the start of a lot of life problems. Everyone processes things differently according to their walk and their role in the kingdom and that is okay as long as the outcome mimics Christ. Most of the time when my actions don’t mimic Christ it’s because I never processed them through a Christian frame to begin with.
For fun, how Megan has changed:
1. She has truly excelled at the work at God’s Resort and found her gifting in working with the kids, including crafts, teaching the kids everyday life skills, beautifying things in the neighborhood.
2. She has put herself out there with the families in a far more open way then she used to with our friends, putting herself in their homes and being real with them.
3. She has relaxed a lot about life and become more patient as well.
Well I just thought it would be fun to share some of these things. There are so many just random life lessons that we have learned, but there is not enough time for me to write them down nor do I kid myself in thinking you want to read them all.
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